Growing up in Saskatchewan, the phrase above is something that’s more likely to roll off our tongues than, say, someone in urban Toronto. The sentiment resonates with us all, if perhaps a little more strongly here on the prairies. When we hear the term, we know it means getting ready. Preparing. And likely for something that isn’t necessarily easy (otherwise why would we need a horse, right?!)
This month, Betty-Ann Heggie wrote a post that hit close to home about fear, and women’s response to situations that make us uncomfortable, worried, or anxious, and how as women we are conditioned from childhood not to tackle those fears. Think about it. Little boys, characterized as adventureous and fearless, are told to tackle fear and seek new experiences. Little girls are told to be careful. Go slow. Interesting, don’t you think?
As a mother, I scoffed at this sentiment a bit. I think I tell both my son and my daughters to be careful and cautious, but I know I certainly shrug off my son’s act-first-think-later philosophy as an 11 year old as “him being a boy”. Whoops. It’s hard to stop those gender stereotypes from rolling off my tongue, and even harder to wash away the words painted on my brain by my own childhood and banish the fear I grew up with, however helpful my parents thought they were being with their (adorable, just sayin’) little girl.
Betty-Ann shares that in order to overcome this conditioning, we have to first realize that everybody is scared. It’s just a matter of how you deal with that fear that ultimately determines your success. She highlights quotes from people like John Wayne and the CEO of General Electric Jack Welch, sharing their thoughts on dealing with fear. Even Eleanor Roosevelt who said, “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along. You must do the thing that you think you cannot do”.
So, how does one face fear and accept a challenge when we’re so used to letting that prickly hot feeling rise up at the back of our neck? How do we move forward when fear is so damned good at holding us back?
Betty-Ann says all it takes is action. Small steps working towards your goal, overcoming fear in small doses, is what it takes to start to get into your stride and accomplish the bigger things. Don’t run the marathon until you’ve tried a few laps around the block first. Her full blog post detailing a recent experience with a protoge is shared on her blog here. It’s valuable reading, and something to bookmark should that prickly feeling on the back of your neck make its nasty self known anytime soon.
When I was working for a home health care agency I had to face my fear of standing up for myself when I was turned down for a promotion because I was still “young”. It took me a lot of baby steps to do it but I did and in the end they gave me a chance so it was well worth facing my fear!
My last job interview. I was so scared. But pulled through and got the job!
The fear I faced was when I had a bad injury at work that left my right leg paralized and 2 back surgeries later, and I couldn’t do the work I did anymore due to it required lifting so after extensive physio and rehab I had to retrain for other work, It was a long scary process as originally my specialist told me that I would never walk again, but I told him I would prove him wrong and I did, and going back to school in my late 30’s was scary but a great experience
I am definitely facing my fears and on a path to success right now! I’ve been a stay at home mom for over 5 years and just last week started working again. It’s overwhelming and scary, but so important for me to help my family financially and set a good example for me girls.
I try to work on small fears whether preparing for a new situation, dealing with unpleasantness from co workers, learning a new concept- as I succeed in one, it gives me strength in another and the courage to keep forging ahead.
I got over my fear of swimming by forcing myself to take the final test. I passed and have loved it ever since.
I faced a fear by traveling solo to a foreign country where english is not the first language spoken! It was such a great experience and allowed me to succeed by giving me confidence 🙂
A few years ago I needed braces. I was so anxious and nervous that I didn’t think I would actually get them. I ended up getting them and I am so proud of myself for facing my fears and anxiety and getting them.
My fear was when my husband and I opened our commercial store..I was so stressed about it but talked my way through it, I was so proud of myself especially after having customers refer us to more customers
When I made a career change after five years working in another field, I was scared and filled with doubt. It is definitely paying off though.
At my old work place there was a big bully and everyone was scared of him, well one day I couldn’t take it no more and stood up to him, it worked out a bit, but boy did I ever feel good!!
to work as a massage practitioner. I was so nervous but applied for the job at a spa. After I gave her my massage, she hired me on the spot. I was so happy, surprised and relieved. This job opened me up to my dream job.
I faced a huge fear when my child was diagnosed with autism. Therapists were in our home for hours each day to teach behavioural & communication strategies. They needed to teach me how to parent in an entirely different way so my child & I could relate to each other, which was all new, overwhelming & quite fearful. But I faced the fears & it led my child & I on a path of success, where both of us continue to learn amazing new things every day!
I can think of so many incidents where I faced a fear but did not let it hold me back. One of the first big ones I remember was after high school I had the chance to go to university in the US. At first I said no but then decided to be adventurous and went. I was afraid because I would not have my good friends there with me and I was so far away from any family. It turned out to be a really good learning experience and helped me be independent and I learned about my strengths.
I am typically very shy and am terrified to speak up for myself but when I became a parent, I was forced to overcome my shyness in order to be the best mom I could be. Now, I not only speak up for my kids and myself, but I have taught my kids that skill as well.
After completing my degree, I went back to school to get a diploma so my skills were more accessible and marketable. More money with no guarantees.
I’m facing my fears now as I’m preparing to go back to school in the Healthcare field ?
I faced my fears when I asked for some more responsibility at my job, I felt like I was being under utilized based on my past experience and I asked and received! Sometimes you need to face your fears
I faced my fear of going back to work after having my children. It involved re-training myself in my field, juggling daycare schedules and trying to balance a career and being a mom. Staying positive helped me transition back and I am so glad I did
I got over my fear of flying and I began to travel to a lot. I eventually found a new career opportunity in a city I would have never had thought I would live in.
Moving to another country, miles away from home, was my biggest (and scariest) challenge. But it was the right decision!
I faced a fear by going to university years ago. I am very much a “home body” and suffered from terrible homesickness when I was young and went to a week long camp that was only about one hour from home. Though there were tears at the goodbyes throughout my 4 years at school, I stuck it out and got my degree! I’m proud of myself for not taking the easy way out and not pursuing further education because of my fear of leaving home and my comfort zone.
I did some public speaking! Was scared to do it, but it helped me realize I am capable and it increased my confidence.
I returned to work for the first time after being a stay at home mom for 12 years. I was more than anxious going to each and every interview but I managed to convince a few employers that the job I did for 12 years taught me organizational skills, multi – tasking and leadership skills, having made umpteen trips to the Principal ‘s office and also having volunteered. Never underestimate what you are capable of. I so enjoy reading Betty ‘s perspective on the challenges women face in the work place. Oh I landed a job and only a couple years later was Executive Assistant to the President. I have come full circle as they say.
after 2 failed marriages I was very afraid to trust anyone again but am glad I faced that fear to try again. I’ve now been happily married for 41 years.
My biggest fear was when I went to write my Project Manager Professional (PMP) Exam. Not only had I completed three years of courses and put in eight years of working in the project field. The exam was $900 and then if I failed, I would have to write it again. Took four hours to write the exam. My co-workers were all excited that I had earned the ability to even write the exam. The last thing I wanted was to go back to work and my family to say I failed. When it came up on the screen that I earned the designation, I cried.. It was tears of excitement, tears of exhaustion and a sense of relief.. I finally did it..
We had major work changes – where I was the on;y one left. It was scary – there used to be 5 and a manager, now just me. I had to take repsonsibility of the entire area. After a lot of mixed feelings, I stepped up and owned it. It is almosrt better than when I had collegaues now that I can manage all the customers and sales myself.
I took a gamble and left my maternity leave 6 months early to take a job doing something completely new. I was terrified, but it’s been going great and I’m glad I did it
Moving out of the country by myself after university to work in Europe. So thankful I did it!
I faced my own fears for my last job acquisition. I feared I would not be able to do the job, mainly because I thought my predecessor was extremely good at it. I feared I would fail miserably during any meetings. I did get the job, and even impressed myself in meetings. It is always hard to be so confident in myself, but I should know that I can do whatever I put my mind to.
Mine was a fear of motorcycles as I have had a brother killed on one, I did many years later get on one, and I still didn’t care for it, but I did it.
My last job interview. I was so scared.
I got over my fear of public speaking, it really helped me
I had second thoughts about taking a promotion at work. My work load increased ten fold and I didn’t think I could handle it. It was scary, but I’ve been taking it one day at a time and learning how to better prioritize my time. Every day I get through makes the next one that much easier.
i had a horrible job while I attended school. I needed the money so i worked through tough conditions and was able to leave with my head held high!
I had to have the courage to find a new flight instructor when I wasn’t able to do my first solo flight, and was told I just didn’t have what it took. A month later, solo flight done with new instructor, and pilot’s licence in hand less than three months after that!
I faced my fear big time almost 3 years ago by addressing some health issues that required entering the hospital again. Very scarey but I got the help I needed and back on track with my respiratory illness.
My twins were welcomed to this world via C-section. I was terrified that I wouldn’t be able to take care of both and them and their older sister in the first few weeks following the surgery. But I did it with some help from family. 🙂
I feared changing jobs for so long , wasnt sure if I would be making the right choice , but I did it !! and im moving up now !
I faced my fears when I reinvented my life and moved to a new province away from my friends and family. It was challenging but it feels good to overcome apprehension and fear.
I went and got my motorcycle license and that was scary believe me
I felt it was time to change jobs in my company and I knew if I got the job it would also mean moving to another location and basically starting over. The idea of leaving my coworkers, most who I adored, to go into the unknown was terrifying (not to mention having to compete for a job)! But at the end of the day, I faced my fears, got a new position in a new location and 6 years later I’m not looking back!
I left my employer and took the risk of starting a new job. it has been a great move and something that I look back on as the right decision.
My biggest fear I faced was being told I had 3 months to live and deciding I was going to beat the cancer . That was in 1999 and I’m still here .
My whole life has consisted of me facing fears. I have generalized anxiety disorder and have agoraphobia. I used to be housebound. In the last 10 or so years I have been facing my fear, which is mostly fear of fear and have been making a lot of progress. I’ve done many things I’ve always been afraid of doing and will continue to do that.
I faced my fear of flying and have been able to travel all over the world.
I moved across the country to go back to school and get my Masters degree. I wasn’t sure what the future held, but I prepared the best I could and then make the leap. (It turned out great!)
I tell myself if someone else can do it too – why can’t I? I used this most recently with some important presentations I’ve done.
I was nervous at my last interview as it was for a position at an aboriginal organization and I am not aboriginal. Happy to say I got the job 🙂
I had just graduated high school, I had worked and saved all through high school to to to Europe for a year..I went but my parents bought a business and I had to come back early, they wanted me to run the business and it scared me..I was 18 and no real experience, but I dove in and it turned out to be a success and set me on a path for future business I owned or ran for many years and health issues happened.
I faced a fear last month by admitting to my doctor and my family that I needed help and taking some time off work while I deal with a health problem.
When I was tasked with leading a team in my job. It was stressful because the team consisted of strongly differing personalities. It worked out because I eventually moved into a management role. Best learning for me was the hands on learning in developing the team.
I’m not sure that I was in fear. I think I always am afraid and scared every time I go out of my room. My comfort zone is very small, but I have this friend that pulls me along and out of it. When I get back to my comfort zone I’m thinking ‘well that was fun’
I think my fear is being alone in a room with someone and having to have a conversation with them. I can’t, for the life of me, come up with things to say. I know… I’m weird
I faced my fears when I decided to get out of an abusive relationship.
When I decided to go back to school at age 47 , so I could make more money to raise my kids
I quit a good paying factory job that I disliked to start a low paying career that I loved and so glad I did.
I started my own business and I was scared! It succeeded though.
i always try and confront my fears head on, take a deep breath, say 1-2-3-go and just do it. it seems to work for me. i don’t want to be held back by my own mind whether it be something big or small
MY fears are for my kids, fear that the job economy will not turn around fast enough for them to get really good jobs. (and then my daughter gets a good job offer and her schooling isnt even done til june, and the job starts in may!!)
Only thing I can think of was taking the plunge and deciding to have kids after being together 10yrs!! Scary at first but easy looking back at it!! Now we are successful parents of 3!! 🙂
Buying my first home! HUGE Fears! Taking on a mortgage and all that extra responsibility. Thank goodness I did it when I did because the housing market here in Vancouver went crazy shortly after that.
I faced my fear of the water and took swimming lessons when I was 34 years old. It was scary to learn something my children was learning when they are 3 years old. After learning how to swim, I was able to teach my nephews to swim and I know whenever I am in the water now, either at the beach or in the pool, I’m safe and my kids would be safe too.
as an anxiety sufferer and worry wart i really feel like i conquer fears, irrational ones, every day to get to my goals of beating this thing
I faced a fear in October and decided to homeschool my daughter – previously, I worried I wouldn’t be ‘enough’ to help her, but she is thriving now!
My first job interview was pretty scary!
I’m terribly afraid of heights and ladders. The ladders at the wharf are particularly scary for me because they don’t rest on an angle. I was on a small island with some friends and we arrived during high tide and left during low tide, so I had to climb down the ladder when I left, it was terrifying. I froze with fear, but I had some good friends help me get down and onto the boat.
I faced the biggest fear when I left my abusive partner and got custody of my daughter. Yup. But totally worth it 🙂
My very first interview ! Absolute wreck, I cried on a way home after it was done….
I faced fear of failure when I decided to change career directions!
When i was pregnant with my first child i was told to do some testing at my job with chemicals that were dangerous, to which i refused. I had several guys mouthing off to me to which i told them to shove their opinions as i wasn’t going to risk my child’s health for them.
I’ve always loved being a passenger on Motorcycles. But have had a fear of riding one by myself. Two years ago, I finally got my learners license, took a Motorcycle course which gave me the skills and confidence I needed to ride and the rest is history! I still get nervous at times. But I am no longer scared!
When I was in grade 4, I was attacked by a pitbull. It was my friends dog and it was very friendly. It just decided to snap one day. (it attacked another person after me and was put to sleep) My leg was very badly hurt and my fear of dogs started. I wasn’t able to walk near any dogs, or be near any because I was so afraid of being attacked again. My mom really wanted to get another pet when her cat passed away and wanted a dog. I had no choice but to slowly gain trust in the dog and to over come my fear, but I did to an extent. I still to this day won’t go near unfamiliar dogs of medium or large size.
fear of getting behind in my career got me back to work after kids
Travelled by myself
I faced my fear when I delivered my daughter naturally with no epidural! It was terrifying at the time, as an epidural was definitely part of my plan but it just wasn’t meant to be that time! Luckily it was a very fast labour & we we’re both just fine!
I am deathly afraid of heights but I really needed to get my roof repaired, so I faced my fear and fixed it myself!
I am in my mid forties and am finally facing my fears and learning to drive.
I do not like heights but when we were in mexico my sons wanted to go ziplining so I pushed through my fears and did it.
Fear of heights which my hubby helped me get over while sightseeing in paris. Couldnt miss the eiffel tower
I was so scared when I got an interview for a mangers position in our company because I had to still go through an interview process with them when I haven’t had an interview in about 7 years. I gave myself a pep talk in the bathroom before hand and aced it!
I didn’t know how to swim so I signed up for adult lessons, faced my fear of water and now look forward to the pool and the lake.
I dropped out of school at 17, went back at 30 and faced my fear, I was a little nervous but was able to get through it with flying colors. When you go back to school as an adult, your more eager to learn and therefore you do much better. thanks for the chance to win
I used to be afraid of needles, but through meditation & breathing, I’m a superstar now!
I had a fear of making some changes..selling our home and moving but jumped in and did it! best decision ever! life is great
I was scared of heights, and went repelling. Overcoming the fear let me know I could tackle anything in life, head-on
I started working as a filling person, opening mail ect…When they offer me a job as a AR retail clerk, I was scare, but I took the job and learn, learn and I was very good at it.
I faced the fear of opening my own business and failing…luckily I managed to succeed and I am growing daily!
2 years ago I decided to open my own business. I had to face the fear of not succeeding and challenge myself each day with endless hours and new business actions.
Just today, i filed my own taxes for the first time! While i hope i don’t make an error i am glad i took control of my finances.
When I was in university, I wanted to head in a specific direction but my supervisors felt that I would be more suited to a different path. I stood my ground and have never regretted doing so!
I am about to face a huge fear tomorrow. I have anxiety but am still going to attend a concert of my favorite band. I can’t wait!
I faced my fear of swimming ! And i took lessons !
trying to change careers, haven’t figured it out yet
Fear of being myself in front of anyone. I always think ways not be judged, I pretty much live to please people all my life. I got over that when I became a mom. I’m standing for myself and for my daughter now. I’ll be silly, I’ll be funny and be just me. I’m at my best, now that I’m a mom 🙂
The fear of flying ughh but learned some coping skills to get me threw the next fight
I’m filling out applications and finally facing a great fear of failure and inadequacy.
Fingers crossed I’m accepted to a Masters program.
uhhh does giving birth count?? I’m going to go ahead and count it. Thrice times.
Sickness is always a big scare/struggle. The fear of losing someone is horrible.
I worked at a place for 18 years and decided to take the plunge and go back to school. Was a great choice!
Starting my own catering business! I was afraid of everything. Being my own boss/ knowing that everything depended on me.
When I started to grow as a business I was flattered but also terrified that people were entrusting me with VERY IMPORTANT moments and events in their lives:
Wedding Receptions, Bar Mitzvahs, major birthdays, graduations, reunions, holiday parties ~ it felt so overwhelming ~ what if something went wrong?
Then one day a very wise old old friend revealed the truth to me: “The worst that can happen is that something goes wrong… in which case afterwards (assuming everyone survives!) everything will be MEMORABLE. And that is not so bad after all: you’ll have amazing memories and terrific stories to tell.
I learned to strive for “perfection” but remember that sometimes the best is when everything is just about perfect, with just enough “flaw” to be memories right on the spot. Remember to have fun.
I definitely faced my fear when I moved to a new City knowing absolutely no one and away from all of my family and friends to make sure my children could grow up in a better environment.
My fear was going back to school to get my GED ,but I went and received my GED last month.
A medical decision that took me 5 years to agree to, and will be the doorway to a much enhanced future. I’m very proud of achieving this as it was a longtime where both myself and my family and medical team did not believe I could or would make this decision.
I had a job interview in have not had a job in 10 Year’s I was so scared but I pulled threw the fear and got the job
definitely facing my fears trying to stay at the top in the work place.