It happens without us even realizing it sometimes. Other times, it’s so glaringly obvious that it feels like a smack to the face. Gender bias in the workplace or a social group wherein being a female seems to automatically exclude us from many networking experiences, promotions, or even team-building exercises.
Think about it.
If you work in an environment with both men and women, who typically tidies up the lunch or meeting room? Who books the restaurant for a staff-member’s dinner? And which group plans a golf outing without considering that you may have an awesome swing? It’s not done entirely intentionally, but more often than not the gender biases we have come out in small, subtle ways like this. Betty-Ann Heggie, in her recent blog post, says this needs to stop for the betterment of everyone, and offers some tips on how.
With industry leaders often bemoaning losing women to motherhood, “She left to start a family and never came back,” the tips Betty-Ann presents are useful to management across all sectors who want to not only keep these young mothers in the workforce, but also help more senior female staff members promote and become leaders themselves.
This month, we’re asking you to hop over to read Betty Ann’s blog post, Five Small Steps Male Leaders Can Take To Retain Women Employees, and see if you can see yourself in the scenarios. If so, maybe it’s time to helpfully send the article to your HR or management! Of course, this practice can apply to situations outside of work too (ball teams, even friendship circles can create this bias). If you’ve felt it, you’re not alone. The steps outlined by Betty Ann can help you too.
This month, we invite you to share a time when you felt you were left out simply because of your gender. Did you confront it? We’re giving one of our readers $100 PayPal to help break those biases. Maybe a lunch meeting with the boss to pitch a new idea, or perhaps some new golf shoes to ensure that the next time the “boy’s club” makes plans, you’ll be ready.
When I was younger
when I was younger I grew up with all boys around me, then I started to develop and they wouldn’t let me do all the fun things, skidooing, quadding, etc.
I know I have been looked down upon working in a hospital because I am female, asking to have a male instead of me as I could not possibly be strong enough to help as I am a smaller female.
Thinking back I think I was lucky as I never felt left out because of my gender. I did grow up with 3 older brothers but that never stopped me from tagging along with them and doing everything they did. I never though I couldn’t and they never said I couldn’t. I try to raise my kids (one boy and one girl) the same way and my daughter knows she can do anything her brother does.
When I was in college, some guys were looking for people to play floor hockey in the gym. They did not want me to play because they didn’t think I could ( cause I was a girl) I insisted I knew how…. as I played with my brothers and their friends growing up. So they let me. Boy, they were surprised at my hockey techiques and were always keeping an eye on me. Hee. Plus I played rough. They were not expecting that.
Oh boy, I honestly can’t think of a time. Well, my workplace was an old boys club, but I didn’t really aspire to join them.
I once felt left out at a friend’s house when there were many people, all were guys, then there was me. It seemed all they wanted to talk about were cars and sports, so I felt like I couldn’t contribute to the conversation. I didn’t confront the issue because I felt like it wasn’t really a gender issue since another girl might have quite enjoyed those topics. Anyhow, I just listened to them and learned a bit! 😉
I cannot remember being left out do to my gender, feeling grateful for that
Honestly, I don’t think I ever feel excluded because of my gender because I’m an open person.
Sometimes I feel like my opinion is not valued simply because of my gender. When leadership is male in gender, I certainly find this to be more true.
Sadly I’ve experienced that at work. I worked in a department dominated by males, and one year all the males in my department were asked to partake in a work event and I was never asked…I found out after the fact. A male coworker told me about it. I approached the issue directly with my Supervisor. That conversation didn’t go well at all. In my opinion it was a “good ole boys club”, and his male ego was bruised with me addressing it directly with him. Eventually there were other minor things that led me with no choice but to approach HR.
When I was a t work I wanted a management job which had always been done by men. I filled in between managers but was never offered the job. I finally asked for it and asked them to give me a try for 3 months. 12 years later I was still there until the company was sold for a nice profit and then I retired.
I used to work for a courier company which is mainly big guys. They always made fun of the ‘little girl’ courier and how i probably needed help everywhere. I used it to my advantage and let anyone that wanted help me. I confronted them daily about it.
At work now, I am sales person and with predominately men its hard sometimes!
Yes I feel I have bur I didn’t confront it
When I bring my kids to schools a lot of the time I feel left out because I’m a dad rather than a mom. I haven’t confronted the moms about it.
I grew up on a street where I was the only girl. I felt included most of the time, but there were a few times where I had been left out because I was a girl. I never did say anything though.
As an adult, I’m not sure I’ve felt left out because of my gender but as a kid I was often not invited to participate in certain activities because I was a girl. My brother and half brothers would get invited on camping and fishing trips by relatives but I was usually left out.
I don’t recall a time where I was not included because of my gender. I did work in an environment with was dominated by men. I was in a union and had equal pay and opportunities.
the only thing that comes to mind was when I was 19 working as a bartender the other older male bartender did not think a young woman should have been doing the job, he was quite nasty and grabby to me so management gave him warnings but this didn’t help they had to let him go.
I think in terms of being heard in business meetings or taking control of a project there was always some resistance from men.
When I took engineering, all the students were boys and I was only girl. Almost never included or asked for opinion
It tended to happen in jobs I’ve held that are more dominated by men, a car component building factory, a car dealership and a building supply retailer, for instance. And not by all, but definitely by some.
It happened in high school when I said I wanted to be a judge.
I was lucky as I never felt left out because of my gender,growing up with 4 brothers i learned young to speak up for myself or be leftout at a young age
I really can’t remember a time being left out because of my gender, guess I have been lucky. But then I also haven’t spent much time in the workforce due to chronic health problems.
I honestly cannot think of a time where I felt left out because of my gender.
I was left out a recess and old I couldn’t play baseball because because I am a girl. I was pretty young but I still remember this
My workplace is predominantly male, and the culture is very male-oriented. Personally, I just ignore it. I don’t need to participate in some of the male bonding events that happen.
No never felt that before
I used to work in an office at a university, which was a male dominated environment, & the males used to be quite seclusive & arrogant, looking down on the female staff like we weren’t good enough. We were left out constantly. After a year I couldn’t take that environment anymore, & I quit because of it & moved on.
I used to work in video games. I got left out a lot, and assumed that I was just there because of my husband, an accomplished designer. People would say “Oh wow, you ACTUALLY play games?” when they found out my gamer score was higher than theirs. Good times.
I worked in an office with 5 men, and was the only women. I often felt left out in conversations, and when my co workers would go out and dine for lunch and I was left out.
Oh yes, there was a definite boys network that one needed to belong to to be part of events.
i can feel that way periodically when my daughter has school functions
I remember getting left out during gym class.
never did
Playing sports during gym class.
I don’t think i have been.
I guess I’ve been the lucky one – I was asked from time to time to do something outside of my job description simply because “women do it better”, but to be honest I didn’t mind that.
only time would of been as a child and felt left out when my brothers did their own thing not including me
I am very thankful that in all of my years I have never felt left out due to my gender.
I don’t really feel like I’ve been left out due to my gender. I was far more likely to be left out by other females. How sad.
only felt out when i was in highschool, which was so long ago lol
All the time. My guy co-workers would never include me in any of their football or hockey talk even though I am a real fan of both. It’s frustrating but I’ve never confronted it or them. I guess it’s more ok for me in this situation because I don’t consider them to be friends, and I have actual guy friends outside of work that would talk sports with me.
Sometimes at work, when a few men were talking shop.
I am the only female sibling and grew up in a house full of boys. I was kept out of so many things and used to play on my own. I haven’t experienced this since childhood though.
I work with men in a male-dominated field. I am constantly left out because I am a woman with four kids and a busy husband. They don’t want to “add to my stress”.
Luckily, nothing significant sticks out in my memory. If I’m interested in something I like to make myself included. I can imagine it is a huge issue for some though, especially if working in a male dominant employment.
my co-workers were talking about fishing, asking each other about their recent catches, skipped past me. They had no clue I knew how to fish and was impressed when I was talking to them about my gear. women fish too!
i used to work in the field dealing with farmers. The field staff was entirely male except for me and the majority of farmers were male. I was always being tested and had to prove myself. Very stressful
I luckily dont think I have been a victim of this. I know it happens a LOT in the workplace
I tend to not go for leadership/strong opportunities so this problem has been few and far between for me. I remember a couple instances during my first part time job as a teen where I felt ignored due to a mix of gender and age. At the time I was still learning to deal with emotions and workplace character all around so I don’t think I really faced it longer than a few moments afterwards of thought.
I can remember feeling a bit left out at university, but I didn’t know what to do about it.
I remember telling a friend of Dad’s what was wrong with his car and him not listening because I was a women and wouldn’t know anything about cars. He had to listen when it was me that working on it when he returned to the shop.
I got my pilot’s licence in my early 20s and was the only girl in commercial ground school…there were a couple of times I was left out, and I wish I’d dealt with it at the time.
Hubby dabbles in the entertainment industry, and I found some of the men, really had no use for the wives of some of the talent. I was really surprised by this, because so many entertainers are female. Anyway, this male entity was confronted, and in fact, hubby supported me and no longer deals with this individual. As he put it, “we are a team”
I always speak up when I feel wronged.
I’ve gotta be honest, my workplace is mostly women so I don’t come up against that problem at work …
i try to surround myself with good people in life so as to avoid these types of situations
years ago when I worked for a bank , girls were mainly used for tellers & ledger keepers but the better jobs were always reserved for men. Thankfully that’s all changed now.
When I was in school I so badly wanted to play football. No other sports interested me. My school only had a boys football team. I wasn’t allowed to join. I definitely felt left out. Unfortunately I didn’t confront it. Looking back – I really wish I had of.
Yes, My workplace used to consist of mostly men. They would all plan manly activities together as team building activities and I would be left out. Now that we have more women activities that everyone would like are planned
I don’t think I have been, although I’ve been made fun of a lot for being a “woman driver.”
Years back I worked in a grocery store and it seemed like certain jobs were for certain genders. Trying to get ahead there as a woman was not easy. I never said anything at the time because I was young and did not know any better
I’ve been fortunate. I haven’t experienced this in years. I’d like to think that I would confront it if I was put in such a situation.
I often feel that way at work because I am the only woman working in office we are in.
I cant remember ever feeling that way!
Yes, I feel there have been times when I have been treated differently but I did not address it.
It happened when I was younger but nothing has happened recently, that I can think of anyways.
I am in a male dominated field and when I was young it was very tough to ‘bypass’ the boys
I was invited to a business association meeting for my store. When I got to the meeting it was all men. They were expecting a male as I go by Sam. I stay but was uncomfortable as I knew I didn’t belong!
I work in IT and I frequently feel left out because of my gender
I don’t feel like I was ever left out because of my gender.I make sure to speak up if there is something I want to do.
There was an art project that my teacher said was “for the guys”, and i was excluded. I was very upset and went to the principal.
When I was a kid
When I was a kid for sure I got left out while playing sports but I did not confront them
Probably because my name is Jessie (with the IE female spelling, duh…) and I have a deep voice ~ when I meet people who I’ve talked to / written-sent resume to) people have often been very surprised (and I might add, disappointed) when they meet me (a petite female) in person .
On several occasions ~ especially on job interview type situation I can “sense” a medium to BIG disappointment and find I have more “proving myself” to do ~ and on some occasions even attempts more or less immediately “invited” to leave and not “wastes” anyone’s time…
Suffice it to say that thanks to great parents and an early grounding in “feminism” ~ I don’t back down without at the very least a battle of WITS. Often my “cheekiness” (I prefer to call it gutsy or chutzpah) I often manage to gain just enough respect (or at least curiosity) to get a fair hearing ~ though there are some diehard jerks that there is no reasoning with ~ but who’d want to work with/ or even know then anyway?!
I have found that working with all men and sitting on an all male board that my opinions have fallen on deaf ears at times due to my gender.
I dont really think so! lol- I don’t have a better answer than that!